Just over a year ago the wheels came off. In order to avert a head-on collision I steered into a ditch. As soon as I stopped skidding the engine blew up. No matter how good it looks in the garage, and no matter how hard you try to fight the rust, old wheels always stand a good chance of betraying you.
I started talking to Allison right after I crashed and burned. Talk turned to friendship, friendship turned to affection and affection turned to love. It’s been close to a year now, and it’s still wonderful. We just get each other and give other what we need without even thinking about it. Who knew things could be so easy?
It has not been totally easy, of course. We’ve had to work through some of my stuff, some of her stuff and a bunch of other stuff. But most of all distance. Distance is a bitch. We talk and, thanks to the Internet, see each other every day, but that’s a pale substitute. We’ve visited each other often, but because of their rarity, our visits are imbued with a certain weight, as though we have to pack three or four weeks of a relationship into a long weekend. We’ve managed as best as we can to keep having fun and to keep living in the moments we have. We’ve managed to not get bogged down too much by stormy pasts, uncertain futures and those damnable, damnable trips to the airport which send us off on our separate ways. But it’s hard. About as hard as something that you can still call happy gets. No one is meant to fly so much. It’s such an uncivilized way to travel.
The future always remains at least a little bit uncertain and there is still stuff to be worked through, but we’re about to eliminate a good bit of that uncertainty and all of those damnable drives to the airport. In late December I’m flying to San Antonio on a one-way ticket. The next day Allison and I are taking off in her car and we’re driving back to Ohio. She’s moving up here for good.
Because of the kids and all of the changes and adjustments in the offing we’re not setting up housekeeping just yet. But it is an important step. And an exciting one. For the first time we’ll be able to get on like most folks get on. To hang out, go out and be together without all of that weight and distance getting in the way. Without having to worry that, if we pick the wrong restaurant, we won’t be able to make up for it for another month. Most of all we’re both creatures of habit and routine and it will be awful nice to fall into some comfortable ones with each other at long last.
I’m really looking forward to that. I’m especially looking forward to the drive back from San Antonio. It’s been a while since I’ve been on the road. It will be nice to cruise down the highway again, confident that the ride will be smooth and steady.